Is There a Place For Compassion at Work?
Many moons ago, teaching English as a Second Language in a small inner-city Brisbane college, I found myself in the middle of a traumatic break up. Breakups can be truly heart-breaking sometimes. After 8 years together, it all vanished into thin air overnight, leaving me alone, with The Cure rotating on my Mp3 playlist.
The following day I fronted up to my job as an English as a Second Language Teacher, after a night of crying and sleeplessness. I’d barely eaten a scrap all day and had 20% focus on my job at best. I got through teaching the first class, but in my break I found myself in my Director's office in a flood of tears. I couldn't muster the strength to finish the day.
We’ve all been there, or somewhere like it, during our career. Emotionally ship-wrecked and unable to perform. And if you haven’t experienced it, count yourself lucky that workplaces are changing now. We can get to be human in most places we work, and organisations who understand this are embracing the power of connection and compassion.
Now, what happened next could have gone either way. I was vulnerable, and being vulnerable at your place of work 20 years ago could be a bit of a hit-and-miss situation. My Director could have easily sacked me, yelled at me, or told me to get back on with the job and quit moping. Because, you know, worker protection was not particularly robust back then.
Or, she could have squirmed, changed the subject, made light of the situation, or fobbed me off to another team member. All of these were not unlikely responses in the past.
But, I’m glad to say, something very surprising happened instead….
She got up from her desk, gave me a warm hug (exactly what I needed), and said, ‘You know Ruth, not many of you know this, but I’m a practicing Buddhist. You need some time to sit with this struggle, and give your self compassion. Please, take a few days off and sort your life out”. Incredibly, when I went to the closest Doctor for a medical certificate, he told me he was also a Buddhist and spent some time discussing relationships and acceptance with me.
To say the least, this experience was unforgettable.
What it taught me, was that you can be a leader and lead with compassion. You can be a leader and be a human. It doesn’t make you softer, weaker, or taken advantage of. In fact, it shows wisdom and strength beyond imagination, to be able to share compassion with someone who is suffering.
I understand not all workplaces have leaders who understand compassion just yet. I believe things are changing though, and we’re forging the way to a brighter, more connected workplace of the future.
Compassion is what drives us to get out and help in times of natural disaster. Give to charities when we are struggling with the cost of living. And become aid workers who go directly into warzones to deliver food and medical items to people in desperate need.
Compassion is feeling someone's suffering and being motivated into action.
Compassion = empathy + motivation to action.
Compassion has the power to make humans do incredible things. It releases oxytocin, and lights up the areas of our brain linked to empathy, pleasure, and care-giving. It makes good things happen, and can make life better for others.
There is a very real place for compassion in the workplace. Leaders are the ones who can embody compassion and create a culture where people support each other through growth.
Leaders and team managers set the cultural tone of an organisation. A leader who leads with compassion can dramatically impact the wellbeing of their teams.
How can compassion support you and your teams as a leader?
Research shows compassion can:
- promote healthy interpersonal relationships (Dutton and Ragins, 2007).
- reduce exhaustion and absenteeism in employees (Barsade and O'Neill, 2004).
- increase loyalty and trust (Scott, et al., 2019).
- increase psychological safety (Center for Compassionate Leadership).
How does a leader bring compassion into their leadership?
First, by becoming mindful.
A mindful leader is one who notices and observes - both themselves and their teams.
A mindful leader can observe the fluctuating sensations, feelings, and emotions within, and will see the connection between these things and their outward actions. They will easily translate these observations into their observations of others and notice when issues are arising in others.
Then, through this mindful observation, a leader can choose to act with compassion.
Worline and Dutton (2017) explain the role of organisational compassion as a process where we move from an individualistic view to an interaction unfolding between people. Aligned to that, we can look at the role of the leader in shaping the organisation through their actions.
In connection to compassion, a leader can lead meaning-making in suffering by creating a sense of presence, or by creating a space for the expression of suffering. As such, while the leader is not necessarily involved in the actual event, they are creating the space where compassion can grow (Worline & Dutton, 2017).
Again, this comes back to what leaders pay attention to; how mindful they are of themselves and of others, and how their role modelling can engender or reduce compassion in an organisation.
When a leader mindfully observes fluctuations or disruptions within themselves or their teams, the act with empathy.
To begin the process of self reflection, a leader can ask themself:
Am I compassionate towards myself?
Do I believe I am compassionate?
Do I show compassion to my teams?
Am I afraid to show compassion to my teams?
What evidence do I have that compassion exists or doesn't exist in my organisation?
Take your time to respond to these questions in a quiet place, after spending some time in mindfulness.
There's plenty to explore about compassion in the workplace. We invite you to explore with us as you support your teams and leaders to thrive.
Get help bringing your wellbeing project to life
Do you want expert support in delivering a wellbeing project to your workplace or community?
Or are you hoping to bring evidence-based behaviour change to your teams?
Bringing wellbeing to small and large groups is not always a straight-forward practice.
It requires you to have an in-depth understanding of the topic, skills in research and presenting, and an ability to adapt and be flexible when project needs change.
If you’d like help putting together and delivering a wellbeing project, we can help.
We’ve worked with national and international clients to design and deliver educational programs and content to create lasting change within workplaces and community groups. We’d love to talk with you about how we can help you reach more people and get better results.
References
Worline, M. C., & Dutton, J. E., (2017) ‘How Leaders Shape Compassion Processes in Organizations’ , The Oxford Handbook of Compassion Science: Oxford Handbooks Online, Oct 2015.